Japanese Women Lower Standards?
The trend of Japanese women’s prerequisites for a partner has changed from Sanko, which means three high levels (high income, high educational background, and high height) into Santei, which means three low levels (low posture, low risk and low dependency) according to Mari Kanazawa’s Watashi to Tokyo blog.
Ikemen means good-looking guy. She says the very popular girls fashion magazine ViVi recently conducted a questionnaire on “What type is your next boyfriend?” To Kanazawa’s surprise, over half of the answers were “I prefer B-otoko to Ikemen.” B-otoko means B class and also Busaiku otoko (ugly guy). Some of the comments were:
- When nice-looking guys are nice to me, I wonder, “Will he know how to treat woman like this?”
- For me, a nice-looking guy is out of my romance. They just make me nervous.
- Nice-looking guys tend to sulk easily because of their pride. But B-guys are tough. So that friendship can be warmed easily.
- Nice-looking guys know they are cool, so when they dress, they seem narcissists to me. But when I see B-guys dressed, it makes me smile, it’s pleasant for me.
This development does not seem to bode too well for the totally Ikemen guys like myself though. O tempora, o mores! But Kanazawa says:
B-guys are not popular because they are B, B-guys try to complement this missing part by attitude, so that they would be comfortable to be for women. Our standard for beauty may change in the future. Come to think of it, there is no accounting for taste. I don’t know my handsome is your handsome.
She wonders what the perspective of foreign women may be about all this?
There’s nothing wrong with a woman realizing that she isn’t pretty enough to be picky about who she dates, and this is all Cosmo-magazine nonsense anyway.
May 28th, 2007 at 5:14 amYeah I’m not fussy. I like about 90% of Japanese girls. I don’t care pretty or ugly, their all beautiful in some way.
May 28th, 2007 at 8:49 amI tend to think that ikemen girls are usually average looking girls hoping to pick up a little vicarious stature. I can only remember one real stunner who went for ikemen, but both times she got married, it was a pug-faced guy. I think the sanko thing was a press invention, anyway.
May 28th, 2007 at 8:52 am“This development does not seem to bode too well for the totally Ikemen guys like myself though.”
lol. My B-otoko soul weeps for you. Which of us is the happier?, I think it is immaterial, if you are happy, and I am happy, within ourselves, does it really matter that lovelies flock to your side, and turn from me in horror and pity? . . . . . *sob, sob* Yes, yes it matters.
The thing is, everyone is questing away for things for themselves, even deciding to “settle” for a B-otoko is worrying about YOURSELF. That’s the way of the selfish world, I guess. Give me someone who is happy within themself, and I am happy. I can not bear the company of posers, people obsessed with their looks, their dress, cosmetic stuff. Once you have had the REAL world brought forcefully to your attention, that all falls away like chaff.
Style over substance, the disease of the modern world.
May 28th, 2007 at 10:46 amI certainly would not wish it on them, but if anyone who thinks obsessing over looks and image is anything but a failing of humans, had a child die, they would soon wake up to the trivial worth of all things image.
May 28th, 2007 at 10:49 amFunny. My prerequisites used to be ‘The 4 Ps’ - pulse, passport, penis and pension - and two of those four weren’t really deal-breakers (a passport was one absolute prerequisite, though).
May 28th, 2007 at 1:51 pmBetty Woo: Interesting statement. So, if a passport was an absolute prerequisite, which of the remaining three prerequisites were in fact not deal-breakers?
May 28th, 2007 at 2:13 pmBetty Woo: Interesting statement. So, if a passport was an absolute prerequisite, which two of the remaining three prerequisites were in fact not deal-breakers?
May 28th, 2007 at 2:14 pmIts hard to comment on the scariest yet most obvious possibility…….pulse?
May 28th, 2007 at 3:48 pmWell… it’s a woman’s perogative to change her mind and the two requirements sort of shifted depending on my mood, my bank account and my belief in mankind.
May 29th, 2007 at 12:20 amMost men are not that beautiful like actor or model and the same thing goes for women as well.
“Santei” which means three low level (low posture, low risk and low dependency) is the thing that “Sanko” slogan just came back to the right square one.
And “Sanko” which means three high levels (high income, high educational background, and high height) meant girls’ power to some degree, but not a kind of liberation from men’s domination in the society.
May 29th, 2007 at 7:52 am“This development does not seem to bode too well for the totally Ikemen guys like myself though”
I hope you weren’t sulking
“Nice-looking guys tend to sulk easily because of their pride. But B-guys are tough. So that friendship can be warmed easily.”
At the same time, I bet Tigger doesn’t consider himself tough. I think the only guys who are tough have either got a lot, or are actively.. erm, how you say in japanese…compensating their dating?
May 30th, 2007 at 7:50 amI didn’t bother looking at the B-otoko “Qualifications”, I was awarding it to myself because of how thoroughly I fail the IKEMEN qualifications.
And I am tough clear through, sport. That however, is not to the point with attraction of women, it is not an asset to “Be tough” any longer, if your intent is to please the girls. In any country, but especially where I live, and I really think, in Japan too.
And , I know this will seem like rank sterotyping again, but I was born in South Auckland, I am part Maori, what the Japanese girl meant by “But B-guys are tough. So that friendship can be warmed easily.” would not make the grade. The things I was bred to consider tough, any Japanese would just consider pathology.
In fact, I think what you meant, and what I read you to mean, by tough, is entirely separate from the thing she meant. I saw your name to mean a fellow Kiwi was talking to me, am I right?.
And to be compensating my dating, first I would need to BE dating, and the chance would be a fine thing.
May 30th, 2007 at 1:00 pmI know how you feel, Tigger. If you like, you can text me on 0211551023. I am in Auckland too. I don’t want to let loose any secrets, but we make excellent partners to japanese women. Dyske Suematsu agrees.
May 31st, 2007 at 2:06 pmOops, that was part 2! What I meant to say was:
May 31st, 2007 at 2:09 pmDyske Suematsu agrees
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May 21st, 2008 at 6:12 amjust wonder how a younger looking divorced middle aged guy would go about finding a nice Japanese lady in Auckland for friendship and dating..
March 1st, 2009 at 10:55 pm